caphe's Journal

Disjointed
Some people have been buzzing that Crash vs Brokeback is championing racial issues vs championing gay issues.

Um, okay, As if putting Ludacris in a film makes you a fucking champion of racial relations.

Such statements got me into an argument with a coworker today. I politely pointed out that Spike Lee made a flawed but interesting film in 1989 about racial tensions that got overlooked. Yet here we are in 06, white liberals have made a movie on 'race' and they reward/award themselves for it. If that shit ain't institutional racism, I don't know what is. Wouldn't be surprised if I get fired.

Started watching the latest Harry Potter film yesterday and fell asleep. Is it just me or is that movie a little bit messy? It was hard to follow but I figured it's cuz I don't read the books. Me and my partner noticed that Hogwarts ain't got no Asian males. She, who has read the books, counted two South Asian girls and then there's that Chinese gal that Asiaphile-in-training Potter be looking at, but not a single Asian male in the sea of anonymous magicians. Goddamn, even fantasy magic nerd shit excludes us from the table.

H.P. Lovecraft was hella racist. Just grrreat.

Working on my series of Nguyen poems. They'll suck just as hard as my other poems.

Original Gangster: Chuck Norris
A friend sent me this. It's so stupid that it's funny.

When the Bogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books, he stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

There is no theory of evolution just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to live on the same planet as Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not sleep, he waits.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC claiming LAW and ORDER are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.

When Chuck Norris does a push-up he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris is so fast he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of his head.

Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the Sun up.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris does not get frostbite, Chuck Norris bites frost.

Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DELTA FORCE marathon on Satellite TV.

( Read more... )

Oregon Trail
Yo, i'm performing at U of Oregon tomorrow if any of y'all are in the area. I asked the locals if Lawson Inada and Garrett Hongo would likely show up and they said no.

I read Brokeback Mountain last night, the short story by Annie Proulx. Very, very good - she's a terse, spare writer - but reading it made me respect the movie more, actually. I felt like the movie was much more fleshed out, was much warmer, more human, more compelling. Rare that I think a movie outdoes its literary root...

They're saying that 'Crash' is going to upset Brokeback in a bunch of categories during Oscar night. What do you all think? I never saw Crash, it just seemed like one of them movies that would really piss me off.

Check out this bullshit:
"Conservative talk-show host Michael Medved advises taking a big dose of "March of the Penguins" (Best Documentary Feature nom) to ward off infection from "Brokeback"'s abhorrent agenda: homosexuality, adultery and bad parenting. In Medved's deeply Disneyized notion of nature, the adorable emperor penguins live out all the values Lee's cowboys flout."

Thanks for ruining the cute penguin movie for me, you conservative bastard.

Zeke Got a Zorro Signature
Zeke Got a Zorro Signature

Ezekiel Nguyen got a Zorro signature -
every time he signs
his zig zag name
its like the letters are break dancers
with busted arms and legs
scrawled on the sides of telephone booths,
splintered bus stop benches
and bounced checks

Ezekiel has seen two many Hong Kong flicks
daydreams of sliding across the kitchen floor
instead of mopping it
the hot steam like fog machines
for dramatic entry
packs two gats one gun
for each of your lungs
fuck death
fuck around and that’s your breath

Ezekiel also answers when you call out
Zeke or Z
when his name is shortened to match that scar -
lightning down his left cheek
legend has it
agent orange burned him in the womb like shazaam
legend has it
he crawled as a baby through barbed wire
to cut his cheek a new smile
legend has it
a switchblade cut that bolt
held by a Lao gangster for looking at his girl in a pool hall

he says he doesn’t even see it no more
when he looks in the mirror
he says he’s so pretty he distracts himself
from it
that scar runs like a signature down his face
he gets tired of his own legend
long before you do.

2/6/06 Bao Phi

DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYMN!

Yo, so I have to get a new passport to go to Mexico and all these other countries. I found my old passport. Check me out, 10 years younger, 25 pounds lighter, and 50% more thugged out:

Goddamn. GAAAAAAAAWWW-AAAWW-AWW-Damn. I look like an international arms smuggler or an assassin in that shit. Back in the day, I got a lot of double-takes from ticket agents at LAX, and my friends wanted to get a t-shirt made with this picture of me. Damn, I look shady as hell.

If you're in Minnesota, come to this tonight:

The Loft presents

IMPARTIAL (?)

Asian American Artists and Community Response to the Chai Soua Vang Case

Featuring Tou Ger Xiong, Ka Vang, Blong Yang, F.I.R.E., Ed Bok Lee, Juliana Pegues,

John Thao, David Mura, Shoua Lee, Bryan Thao Worra, Thuyet Nguyen, Daniel S. Le,

Chao Thao, Pete Wong, and CCR

Emcee'd by Bao Phi and Ka Vang

Performance and Informal Discussion moderated by Bao Phi and Tou Saiko Lee

Friday, November 4th, 7:30 p.m.

Free and open to the public

At the Loft, 1011 Washington Avenue South, Minneapolis

www.loft.org

The guilty verdict is in. Six hunters are dead. The Wisconsin attorney general has stated this case was

"not about race". Do we see simply in black and white? Where are the shades of color that flesh out

our reality? Asian Pacific Islander American artists and community members express an alternative

perspective on this case and the surrounding issues which have been lacking in media coverage. Moderated

community discussion to follow show. Co-sponsored by the Loft and Pan Asian American Voices for

Equality.

E'erbody loves lists

Since I was tagged by

patricio55 , xinxin , and susina , does that mean I need to post up my top 15 songs?

Eh, I will just go with 5.

So, here are 5 somgs which are NOT my favorite of all time but the 5 that are currently on heavy rotation.

1. I Want You Back - Jackson 5 (Z-Trip remix)

2. 1 Thing - Amerie

3. song with unknown title - Crystal Kaye - (the track with all the rappers on it)

4. Kugatsu no Omio - Bird

5. Track #15 by A-Mei

Damn. This made me realize I don't know the titles of a bunch of songs I like. Guess I better learn to read Japanese/Chinese/Korean characters.

Also been listening to a lot of the Back in the Day Buffet show on the Beat. Ah, hip hop songs that remind me of my high school days make me happy.

Aiiite, I guess now I am supposed to tag five people, and if I tag you you gotta do the same thing I just did. Uuuuuuuuuugn! So

apafella lilunghwa

nyloism nha_hang_chay

the_skim, YOU ARE IT.

A different kind if memorial

This LJ stuff is weird. Usually I just vent the first thing that comes to mind with some minor self-censorship stuff (gotta be careful about this internet stuff), but what to do about the most personal, or most difficult things. Well, I decided to let go the inhibitions and self doubt and post this for my homie, who feared amongst other things that he would be forgotten. If you're spirit is with us, man, then this is for you.

( Untitled )
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Snowstorm in the Mideast

We have a Mideast in the Midwest show with Mizna here tonight and there's a snowstorm. Dammit. It just so happens that, last time we had the Mideast Midwest show, there was also a snowstorm. That's some crap luck. Come down tonight if you're free, come support and show the snow that you won't be driven off.

Also, come by tomorrow for our new Classic Material show, in which local spoken word artists read their favorite "classic" poem (Neruda, Langston Hughes, Shange, Wong, Alexie, Inada, etc). Check out the flyer, the photo and design is by me. Not bad eh?

more props to Jin for bashing Miss Jones
He may not be an angel, but thank goodness he responded as an artist. He could have chosen not to say sh*t you know, and he says some interesting stuff. Thanks to

asianrenegade for posting this in your LJ man.

http://www.alljin.com/Audio/Exclusives/jin-tsunami_response.mp3

Shooting at North Koreans, Tet, stomping buildings, Palestinian hip hop videos, tsunami...
Mideast in Midwest open mic was cool, and well attended despite the load of snow dumped on us that evening - highlight was the music video Neo-Con Luv by Iron Sheik, Excentrik, and Masari: http://www.3mohammads.com/ Kathy was telling me that Middleastern artists from all over the country want to come and hit up this event - it's real cool, hopefully we can keep the momentum going.

Minnesota Viet Community also celebrated Tet this weekend. Thuyet and me went with two Viet sistas, Thuyet's little brother was there too and I think I embarrassed myself in front of the two Viet women by talking at length about Resident Evil 4. Oh well. Giant Lizard Theatre show was cool, every body surprised me by bringing out a birthday cake. So cute!

D-Flow's Tsunami relief show was dope - D'Lo did a hilarious bit where she put on a wig and a sari and impersonated her mom, talking about what is was like when D'Lo first came out of the closet to her. It was funny, but also poignant, somewhat sad, but very sweet. And it was good to see Pradeepa dance again. She is such a crackhead that I sometimes forget how good she is - then you see her dance and you're like goddamn, girlfriend is maaaad talented.

Started playing "Mercenaries" so I can write about it for the Asians in video games article - it takes place in North Korea, where you are a paid professional who can take jobs from South Korea, China, Russia, and the "Allies" (read: white Americans) to basically kill/capture North Koreans. You have the choice between three characters: a half African American/half Korean male, a half British White/half Hong Kong Chinese woman, or a straight up White European. How multicultural.

Been in the studio. We are in that "I said that one word funny, let's re-record that one word and edit the whole piece" stage. Very nitpicky. But it sounds pretty good.

INFERNAL!!!!!
HOLY SHIT! Infernal Affairs is showing at Oak Street Cinema until Thursday.

MUST GO SEE IT TONIGHT. Yo Minneapolis people, if y'all want to go to the show holla at me, you know the number.

David Wong petition - take a second and go sign this NOW.
http://www.PetitionOnline.com/DWong/petition.html
Please go to the following website and sign the petition for Free David Wong before December 6,2004. We need to gather 10,000 signatures before that time. Make sure to tell everyone you know to sign.

David Wong was convicted of murder that he did not commit 17 years ago. At that time, he was a Chinese immigrant who did not speak any English and was poor. He was wrongfully convicted before an all-white jury but he could not defend himself nor could he afford a lawyer. He was the scapegoat of someone else's wrong doing and a victim of the discriminating, corrupted justice system. David Wong is also my respected uncle.

For more than a decade, the David Wong Committee has constantly worked very hard everyday to prove David Wong's innocence even before the most wicked. They seek justice as their sole reward. Now we need your help to fulfill the mission.

To sign the petition, please go to
www.PetitionOnline.com/DWong/petition.html

To learn more about David Wong, please go to
www.freedavidwong.org

Thank You All
Fei Yeung

Vietnamese pottymouths

Yo, I think I may have finally found my peoples.

Vietnam's rude poetry delights intelligentsia by Nga Pham for BBC news

In a country heavily influenced by Confucian values, poetry is often regarded as a means to enchant and please.

Now a group of young Vietnamese writers have decided to launch an offensive on poetic niceties and capture what they call "life's natural colours".
Open Your Mouth is the name of a literary quartet whose mission, it seems, is to shock and outrage.
( more about dirty-mouthed Viet poets here )

Same As It Ever Was
I was born by the river
In a little tent
oh and just like the river
I've been running ever since

It's been a long, long time coming
But I know a change gonna come
Oh, yes it will

It's been too hard living
But I'm afraid to die
I don't know what's up there beyond the sky

It's been a long, long time coming
But I know a change gonna come
Oh yes it will

I go to the movies, and I go downtown
Somebody keep telling me,
Boy don't hang around

It's been a long, long time coming
But I know a change gonna come
Oh yes it will

Then I go to my brother
I say brother help me please
But he winds up knocking me
Back down on my knees

There's been times that I thought
I wouldn't last for long
But now I think I'm able to carry on
It's been a long, long time coming
But I know a change is gonna come
Oh, yes it will

-Sam Cooke, A Change Is Gonna Come

p.s. I love Sam Cooke's original version, of course. Also try Otis Redding's version. And Al Green's live version just gets me everytime. He will make you feel it.

Current Mood: exhausted
Current Music: Sam Cooke, A Change is Gonna Come

Hey Pumpkin
Okay, this is a lot more fun than it should be. You carve your own virtual pumpkin then you can light it up! I told you I am easily amused.

Shit looks cool though, and is less messy than carving a real pupmkin. Plus, you have none of the guilt for slaughtering and gutting an innocent gourd for your heathen amusement.

http://flashdepot.netfirms.com/129580_pumpkinSim%5b1%5d.swf

Biiiiiig nerd
Wow. So

patricio55 just got an Xbox and asked for advice re: what games he should get, and I just wrote this huge entry divided into two sections: surefire games I think he would like, and games that he might like if he was willing to try something different, and the entry was so long that I had to divide it into two entries.

The nerdiest thing? I did it off the top of my head.

Wow. I want a nerd award.

Go to

patricio55 (dated 2004-10-25) if you want to witness my nerdiness.

Off to the...
Off to the Bay.

Me and Brian and Ka went to go see Ju-On last night. That movie fucked me up. I didn't see what the big deal was at first, then when that dark shadow hovered over that woman, it was all downhill. I think what freaked me out is, the horror was very Asian: the buzzing in the ears, the images out of the corner of your eye, ghosts grabbing you or staring at you while you're sleeping, all that shit - kind of like the stuff that used to happen to us at the old house. F*ck! Scary movies usually don't get me, but that one was hella fucked.

Yo, have y'all heard about Katamari Damacy? It's a game where you play a cute lil' prince, and your father is the alcoholic king of the Cosmos who accidentally destroys some of the universe while on a bender. No joke. So the game involves you rolling around a little ball and get things to stick to it, like a snowball, so that you have more materials to make more universes. When you start off, you can only pick up small stuff, like pebbles and pencils. But as your ball of stuff accumulates, you move on to bigger and bigger stuff, like cats (that meow when they stick to the ball), people (who scream and flail) and then huge stuff like buildings. It was a long shot that it would ever make it to the US (it's from Japan), but it's here, and only $20 retail. And it retained all its localization: all the Japanese music, language, and even packaging are intact, they didn't Westernized the shit up. I now have Playstation envy. I want to play this supercute game right now. It may help soften my grumpy demeanor.

bullet points
Too much to write about, and I leave for the Bay tomorrow. All y'all Bay heads please come see the Jane Kim show, it's a good cause no matter how y'all feel about my work or me. Get Jane Kim into office!

Some quick bulletpoints:

- AAR goodbye show was sad, emotional, but also phenomenal. A lot of people came to support. Too difficult to write about the larger things, without getting depressed or crying. So i'll be simple and selfish and write about the new poem I wrote, which I read there. I didn't expect that kind of reaction from it, much less a standing o. Thanks to all, especially during a time when an insecure brotha is feeling especially insecure (even if he hides it). Thanks especially to comments by

builtonnerves, for making a brother feel necessary.

- For a sexy picture of me and a sexy analysis of my sexyness by the sexiest South Asian in the world, go check out

apafella's LJ. Go ahead and laugh at my pain.

- Shawn of the Dead was funny, until it tried to get serious. Sky Captain had some nice art design to it, but in the end, felt like hurling pretty pictures at you so you'd be too exhausted to notice the movie sucked.

-New Jet Li movie looks hella interesting. I dunno if I trust the director of "The Transporter", but I have to admit the shit (written by Luc Besson) looks more interesting than the other Western Jet Li shit. Trailer: http://filmforce.ign.com/articles/550/550606p1.html

Smashing Poets
So most of you probably already know that Billy Corgan has a book of poetry out, and he's reading here at my place of employement in a couple of weeks. BTW, if you see a flier advertising his reading, I designed it, thank you very much.

Anyway, we predict it'll be a mad house on the day of his reading. But the true purpose of this post is, PLACE YOUR BETS NOW: how many people will ask me if I am James Iha at the event? Seriously. Winner who guesses correctly or who gets the closest with their guess will get a $5 check from me.

Infernally Yours
Spoke to Jenny the other day, and she told me she had gone to see Infernal Affairs in the theatre and really liked it (she usually doesn't go see movies that are kinda mainstream, even Asian ones). Of course it probably helped that Infernal Affairs has both Tony Leung and Andy Lau and some other hottie guys in it.

So I was thinking of going to see it tonight, and wouldn't you know it, it's not showing here in Minnesota. At least not yet. F*ck.

Well, it's probably for the best, since I really want to see the Brad Pitt/Leonardo diCaprio version, or as I like to call it, the cracker version. I'm sure it'll be better, since there won't be any of those pesky Asian men in it. Thank god that Americans are remaking it so that there is 100% less Asian people in it. I mean, come on, i'm an American for chrissakes, I shouldn't be expected to sit through a movie with Asian men in it. I hope they put some of those hot Asian women in the American version though, maybe Kelly Hu or Lucy Lui or that one girl from 2Fast 2Furious.

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